3 Steps to Help a Parent with Dementia Who Refuses

 

Does your parent with dementia refuse help from you even when they clearly really need it? Are you tired of the constant battle?

In this post, we are going to talk about 3 steps you can take to help a parent with dementia who refuses help from you that will empower them and make your life easier so everyone in your home can be happy.

By the way, when you do get that win, comment it down below so we can celebrate you and while you're at it, join our facebook group so a LOT of us can celebrate you.

1. Understand why they are refusing

4 Common reasons why they may refuse are:

  1. More control or independence

  2. Protecting themselves from potential pain or injury you may not be aware of

  3. Not wanting the embarrassment of forgetting steps in the middle of a task

  4. More privacy or independence

If this isn't obvious to you right away, you can find this out by asking 1 simple question at a time and or trying multiple solutions based on these 4 common reasons for refusals until one sticks.

#2: Make adjustments based why they are refusing

We'll organize what adjustments we can make based on the 4 common reasons for refusals

1. If your person with dementia wants more control, instead of telling them they have to shower for example instead make showering something that gets them what they want.

As a quick example, if your Dad loves to eat, say "We need to wash up before dinner" as a motivator for cleaning

2. If your person with dementia is refusing eating or showering due to pain or discomfort you can make adjustments to the bathroom like:

  • Getting a shower seat

  • Warming the bathroom with a heater if that is safe

  • Making sure their teeth are in good shape if it hurts them to eat

3. If your person with dementia is refusing a task protecting themselves from the embarrassment of forgetting steps in the middle of a task. You can:

  • Have items laid out

  • Simplifying the tasks

  • Having visual cues

  • Giving simple instructions

    Helping them hand over hand can help

4. If they are refusing because they want more privacy or independence

  • Have them hold a towel to cover private parts while you assist them with bathroom tasks

  • Simplify other tasks like cooking (it can be as simple as them holding something for you)

  • to encourage some independence and purpose for them

#3: Get help from a healthcare professional

The last idea is to get a healthcare professional like a doctor or occupational therapist to

Evaluate their pain and abilities in order to help you best make adjustment and make refusals less frequent

So there you have it, 3 ideas to help your parent who refuses :

  1. Go through the 4 common reasons and to find out why

  2. Make adjustments according to their needs

  3. Get healthcare professionals to help you get to the bottom of refusals

Try at least 1 of these 3 strategies and see if you can get yourself a win with your loved one or client.

If you do, make sure to comment that win down below and while your at it, join my facebook group and share it with our community as well by clicking the link below.


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At Dementia Caregivers Success & Support Community, you will get:

  • Celebration for all you do as a caregiver that often gets overlooked

  • Support and answers to questions that come up as a dementia caregiver

  • The most kind and amazing community of folks going through what you are

 

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5 Dementia Caregiver Tips to Prevent Challenging Behaviors

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Why Do People With Dementia Repeat Themselves? (3 Reasons)